Secrets

I logged onto myspace this morning to check up on my friends like I do everyday. One of my friends reposted this bulletin about anonymously posting your secrets. The really sad thing about it is that most of these kids are so upset over unrequited love... Some of these kids really need help, others really need to get caught. I can't imagine the pain that they're going through and causing others... Some of them are so bad that I almost don't want to post them, but maybe by doing it I'll help someone somewhere realize what is going on and protect their children better.

I just had to share some of these - the good, the sad, the sick, and the ones from the kids who I'd like to kick pretty hard, right in the pants.

11. i don't think i will ever have the guts to tell him that i fell in love with him
12.i cry myself to sleep at night because im not with him
14. Most people think of me as a friend, but i wouldn't care if most of them died.
22.i've cut myself, my friends have told me to not do it again...but i actually enjoyed it and i want to do it again...but if i do i'm afraid they will hate me.
25.i love bob the builder
32. i'm afraid of this, of what i've become, of where we're going.
36.your starting to realize that shes not the right girl and I am....
37.You keep telling me i'm just pretty in a different way, I hope you know that just makes me feel worse.
40. i honesly think i am a lot prettier than the girls i am friends with. when i am infront of boys, i try to act like i dont know they think im hot. [ i dont think it works ]
46. im jealous of my sister because shes always in the limelight.. what about me? i thought i was just as great.. but i dont feel like my parents think so
47. I feel bad for my little sister. I'm always in the limelight and I wish I could make it so she doesn't feel like that ^^
51.im so scared hes going to hurt me again
53. i used to strangle myself because i liked the rush
54. i've had sex with 11 guys, and only my sweetheart is any good
55. im not sure if i am with him or not anymore. i still want to be, but he's given up hope... and i know i shouldnt want to be with someone like him but i fell in love with the jerk and miss him
56. i think im bisexual but i dont want to tell anyone cuz im not positive
60. my siztr dared me to make out wid a boy wen i was 5 wit a boi who was bout 8 or 9 and for that i would love to slap her across the face for talking to into it
65. Sometimes really violent and destructive thoughts just uncontrollably pop into my head, and i don't get help because i know they'll lock me up... one day i think i'm gonna end up killing someone
70. everyday i wish he would kiss me again just like he did for the first time.i miss him more than anyone will ever know.
72. I lied about her. I knew what I was doing, but didn't want to tell. Now everyone knows she's bi and feels bad for me... even though I didn't really want to.
76. hes cheated on me once, and i hear that he does it to me still.
79.Im suicidal and im not even 14 yet.. I get abused at home, and take tons of shit in at school. Suicide feels like the only way to make all my pain go away... its the only way out.
85. idk if i really care that i am hurting u so bad once again...
87.i think hes nice. really nice. but hes using you. i feel it. b.c. im your best friend. and if you lose your virginity to him...youll get so hurt...
89. i never really used condoms that much even though i force my friends too
96. i wish the world would end and i could go to heaven.
99. sometimes i wish i could die just to see who is at my funeral, and who really cares... theres a girl in my school who i would never want there.
102. Being with my best friend makes me feel ugly.
106. I have a "friend"and i think that the only reason im still "friends" with her is because i feel sorry for her and i feel really bad about it but i dont want to hurt her feelings by telling her i dont really like her
110.my best friend and my mom think that one of my good friends is in love with me. but im in love with his best friend. who loves me back...and i used to love the other one. im so confused.
116.i may look like the nicest girl ever but im really a total conceited bitch
119. I can't think of a good way to kill myself.
121. I tried to kill myself so many times, I lost count.
129. when i look into her eyes, i forget about the people of my past who treated me lyke shit. ive never been treated so well....i feel lyke weve been 2gether longer than we really have. i wanna spend the rest of muh life wit her...
130. ^^That's how I feel about him... :)
131. We talked and I know he'd be okay if we ended up together, but I feel bad because that's what my family wants too... They always pressure my relationships... that's part of why they've been so short.
144....i wish i was straight but im kind of happy being gay...i just want to be accepted
148. me and my best friend are so close. i basically literally love her to death. i wanna be with her the rest of my life.
159. I work at a daycare and molest children
160. I work at a preschool and molest children
163. I molest my children when they're too young to remember it, and that's the only reason I keep getting my bitch pregnant
164. I was molested, and I hope these assholes ^^^ rot in hell
165. everyday, i think of things that could happen that would cause me to die. most of the time i think of getting into a car accident. today, when i plugged my laptop in to charge, i imaged it blowing up. does this mean i want to die?
169. i hate my sister but if she ever left id probably kill myself because i actually dont hate her i love her more then almost anyone but im jealous of a lott of ha.
171.I'm gonna be lost when my sister goes to college this year. D:
172. i luv my sister and that's the only reason i didn't move out to live in the dorms... who would take care of her then?
180. i got pregnant and i got an abortion but didnt tell anyone anything
181. I tried to get pregnant to keep him...
182. i cry almost everynight.
185. I'm afraid to tell my best friend I'm bisexual.
198. I cry myself to sleep at night :'(
207.i am going to CRY SO MUCH at my 8th grade graduation.and even more at my high school graduation.
208. i've replayed that last kiss with him in my mind almost every night since it happened [it was june 07], and i cant help but to think he's forgotten me.
211. I actually look forward to death, but I'm not suicidal. . .?
214. i secretly dont really like my relatives because they've been bitches to me all my life.. it seems that they r changin but idk if i should even b willin to giv them a second chance because of howw horible they wer 2 me but im afraid that i wuz horrible to them??????????????
218. i was a bitch when i was little and abuse my pet and use to think when id have a kid i would throw it down the stairs for fun? im a changed person now and i think that people like that should go to hell. im ashamed of my past and no on even relizes how much i've changed its crazy.
219. im alone all the time. i cry everyday. my mom makes me cry a majority iof the time. my grades are low b.c. ive stopped caring. i really have stopped caring altogether.
222. I've thought several times of doing suicide and hanging myself, and only tried to attempt it once.
225. My mom lies about hitting my sister... I wonder if she just doesn't remember?
226. ^^ she lies about hitting me too
227. ^^^she hits me now...
230. I'm terrified of my dad, even though he never did anything to make me that way, it's just the way he looks at me.
231. sometimes i hate how my stepdad looks at me... or notices my underwear
233.I hate all of my friends... if they died, honestly, i dont think i would care.Its not like they notice when somethings wrong anyways...
237.Me and my friends had a plan similar to #500, except we'd give candy covered in acid to kids who we thought were asshole
238. I can't believe all the hurt and pain in the world. Sometimes it doesn't seem worth enduring, even though I know suicide is a cop out.
241. i'm gay and i luv my best friend
242.^ me 2 and weve been friends since kindergarten...11 fuckin years!!! and im not out 2 him and i feel so bad for holding such a deep secret it kills me more and more
243.^me too and its killing me cuz all i want to do is kiss him
244. i wish i had been a virgin when i met my boyfriend... it almost kills me inside that i wasn't
257.i so badly want to have sex
260. i was so mad at my real dad for so long until i grew up and realized he was lucky cuz he's as far as possible from my mom
261. when i talked to him for the first time, i couldn't tell him how mad i was b/c i was just happy to hear his voice
265. I'm cheating on my girlfriend with her sister and she's better
266. I got an STD from her boyfriend while she was pregnant... and he wasn't even that good...
267. I hooked up with an ex but found out he was cheating on his gf with me and didn't tell her, but stopped seeing him, but does that make it my fault?
271. Ive hold so much in...i never can tell people my past...i think i mite become a murder.
274. I started this, and added extra so people wouldn't notice.
277. I touch my sister once and it just kills me inside...
283. i wanna bang your mom. [×
286. i'm bulimic. i never stop thinking about my weight/body. i'm addicted to adderall, and i'm pretty sure i'm depressed. i'm madly in love with my boyfriend, and i know he doesn't give a shit about me. i would give anything in the world to have someone care about me the way that i care about him. . . i know i'm never going to be good enough.
290. i'm jealous of my sister b/c she lost so much weight, and i gained :(
299. I was physically and emotionally abused by my x girlfriend for 7 months, and i didnt do anything about it.
301.I think im going to be anorexic if i dont loose weight soon. i want to be a model, and i will do ANYTHING for it.
307. I put myself in horrible situations just so my family notices me.
309. I'm addicted to pot and my dad's the one that gives it to me
310. I'm sick of stupid sluts. LIterally were 14 and 15 years old. Fucking guys and giving head every weekend isn't supposed to happen. Find a guy you love.. settle down.. and stop fucking around all the time.
315. i hate my mom for not taking us to the doctor or dentist... and that she blames it on us, even though we were so little... i wonder if she'll ever figure out...
320. i fixed the spelling on a lot of these.
325.i love alot of boys but theres 3 that r killin me & i tyrred to kill myself more then 2ce im lucky im still here and i think comminteing suicide is aa way of sayin get fire me i quitt and im too skinny i ben told but i think im fatt
332. He said he'd always care about me and we could still be friends nd hang out and if things were different he wouldnt do it.Hes such a liar
333. he said it was him not me, but why did it make me crazy? why doesn't he ever hang out with me anymore...?
334. i really want to kill myself. just to see if anyone really cares, cuz i don't think anyone would give a shit if i died. isn't that bad?
335. I was molested by my best friend when I was little, right under everyone's nose. And I hate them for not seeing.
336. I can't believe she stayed with him even after I told her what he did to me.
337. I HAVE NO ONE TO TALK TOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!
341. I;m treated like shit. i constantly help others but get abused when i go home.
343. I hate being called a prep but I can't help it I'm prettier than they are! It's not my fault!344. ^^ bitch
345. i used to feel that way
346. my sister doesnt even try and shes gorgeous but i can spend 3 hours on myself and never be pretty enough
354. My cousin and brother took advantage of me when i was in 3rd and 4th grade.
361. I think i have a tumor in my brain...so i cant EVER go to the doctor cause they will notice it..so i lie when im sick
364.im sorry that it bothers you that i hate my parents..but i truely do...when they get angry they beat me. i have bruises from it...i hide it everyday from everyone..i smile and laugh like nothings wrong. but im dying to scream the truth.
371. i am addicted to sex
372. I want to spend the rest of my life with him. His family is amazing, he treats me like a princess, and he always tries to help me out. I just wish that I didn't feel so bad about all the stuff that he does for me, even though we've talked about that. I wish I knew how to discern between when he's mad at me or just frusterated, although now he's getting better at letting me know... I know it's so early to be thinking about marriage, but I want to be his wife... I just wonder if he feels the same sometimes. But then he'll do something sooo cute, and I know. :)
373. someone in my family is the biggest dealer i know.
376. i met him on myspace and they'll never know
377. ^^ and he was 30
384. i have gotten naked on my web cam before to show my body off to one of my boyrfriends.
388. God has a plan for me, but wtf does he want
393. im so scared of growing older, and losing you.
397. my best friend told me he is gay but i keep denying it (but im not racist)
412. i see more than he realizes... i can see in his eyes too, i know exactly what they are all talking about.
413. I wish someone would figure which one of these I wrote.
422. i had a sexual relationship with a 21 year old man when i was 13.
425.I'm in love with some kid thats absolutely disgusting and perverted but somehow he just turns me on and i wanna lick him all the time.
426. i made out with a guy who was engaged and haven't told anyone.
427. i think im going to kill myself if my boyfriend leaves me.
428. Im killing myself...n told my best friend that there was nothing wrong.
440. i did become a devil worshiper when i was in my young teens.
441. i have lied to my parents (which i hate to lie) just so they wont think differently of me.
447. I hate my dad so much but i hide it bcuz i dont want to stop seeing my baby step sister. [i luv her so much!!]
451. sometimes i imagine how great life would be if i killed my stepmom.
456. My best friend messed up and now they think shes "displaying risky behaviors" and put her in a mental hospital
457.It kills me that i cheated on him over winter break with my ex boyfriend
459.I dont think i have forgiven my dad for what he has done && i dont think i ever will.
462. hahahha my secret has alot more to it than one thing. I fell in love with a jerk. My friends dont know the real me. I seem to be liked by the wrong people. I think im fat. I cant seem to stop cutting. i want some to love so bad it hurts. i hate sounding this stupid. i try not to judge people. im a effin klutz. im smart but decide to screw up my life. I dont want to disappoint my parents but always do. i feel like im a nobody. I doubt God but i dont want to. I cry everyday and it makes me feel sooooo weak. i want to die but want to live at the same time. I try way to hard to fit in. i hurt the ones i love. but it all leads to hating M Y S E L F even M O R E
463. you her things about ppl like this ^^^^^and you wanna punch them.. atleast i do
466. When we got drunk together, I really do remember kissing you. i just say i dont because i know it would break my bf's heart. & i think that i liked it.
467. i really hope im not pregnant and id feel better if i was actually dating him. i dont care that i will get hurt again because i have no respect for myself anyway..
470.he is my anti-drug. he hates it wen i get high so we made a deal i dont do any kind of drugs if he doesnt doesnt smoke. = ] were good together.
471. I'm going to kill myself if someone doesn't notice and help me soon.
474.I... am a messenger from god.. My job is to bring people to him.. If you open minded.. i can read it..[not kidding] The worlds going to end soon.. Any idea where ur going to go when you die.. I do..
475. ^^ i don't believe in god, does that mean you don't exist?
479. i think the reason why i'm with my boyfriend is because i want to lose my virginity. i really do love him, but i think i'm inlove with somebody else.
481. I hate that my parents always try to shove their religion down my throat and make fun of mine...
483.I hate my life..everyone i have ever loved has never loved me back. I have been abused by my parents but to scared to tell my friends..
484. i ate a cookie. =D
485. when i was young, i actually had a fetish for animals.
486. I was raped a year ago (I'm a guy) and never told anyone.
487. I am in love with a myspace fake. I've known it for sometime, and they have no idea. I know who the fake is of, and I know the real person. I really am in love. I don't want to be anymore though
488.Sometimes I wish I could be popular, so I could feel loved
490.im starting to like a guy ish but the problem is hes had sexual relationships with a guy but i think i might be pregnant from this guy and i have no clue what to do because he's still with the guy and i have absolutely no clue what the hell im supposed to do i can't raise a fucking child i can barely care for myself haha you want to know the worst part? i have a boyfriend who has absolutely no clue about anything that happend
491. i tried to kill myself 7 times but couldnt or was stopped
492.My uncle and my cousin both have committed suicide in the past three years.
493.i love when he touches me, it makes me feel like i matter.
494.^^but he has a girlfriend.
495. i've been molested and raped and tried to off myself b/c of it... but now i am happy with him
499. i bottle things up and when something really gets to me i go off, and i can really hurt people, and i really dont want to.
500. I donate food to homeless people and put acid in it so they die.

See what I mean?

I hope that maybe someone who reads this can help another person that they know. I hope that we can all identify with these poor kids and understand what they're going through. We need to be more observant and help them. Yeah, that might mean getting over our egos, but damn - isn't it worth it? We can save these kids, really we can - if we just open our eyes and look at what's right in front of us.

And that's why I'm an humanistic athiest. With all this going on, you can sit there and tell me there is a kind and loving God who wants us all to come back to heaven? Seriously, we have 14 and 15 year olds wanting to kill themselves because of their addictions, being raped/molested/beaten, feeling so inferior that the only way out they can see is death?

And that's why I'm also Buddhist. If I can achieve nirvana, maybe I can help others to do so too... and maybe we can save this world of ours... and our poor babies who're forced into this world of suffering and delusion... And I can't do it alone, I know that, but maybe with help we can reach out and save them... maybe they can have a better life than those of us who couldn't speak up, couldn't reach out ourselves, couldn't admit there was a problem.